You've gotta stick to the rules. But whose rules?

If you were to come into my kitchen and look in my cutlery drawer (which admittedly would be odd behaviour on your part) you would find that my cutlery goes in the right order.  Left to Right: Knives, Forks, Spoons.  Now you might agree with me.  You might disagree and say that either they should go in some other order or that perhaps the order isn’t important!  Or you might say that, well, it’s up to me to decide what’s right for me and my cutlery drawer, not you.  And you’d be right.  Whatever your answer, you are right.  Confused? 

A whopping 93% of us have rules about managing ourselves.  I’m not talking about the laws of the land or even the laws of physics or nature.  I’m talking about the little rules that we all have about what we should do and say.  They become what’s ‘right’ for us.  For some it might show itself in small rituals like always cleaning the bathroom sink and taps before going to bed – we might cal it a ritual, but actually it’s just a rule we’ve made up.  Or always tidying the house before going to bed and so on.  One of my rules is the order that cutlery goes in my cutlery drawer.  It’s trivial I know but it’s there nonetheless!  And just to put this in context – it doesn’t govern my life, I don’t need to keep checking on the cutlery to make sure it’s not misbehaving and I don’t get cross with anyone kind enough to do the washing up if they put it back differently.  It’s just simply, how I like it done!

So, have you identified any of your rules yet?  If we have rules, it’s fair to assume that other people have rules too.  And what about those other people and their rules?  How do you react when other people break your rules?  And if you notice someone else having the same rule as you, do you then presume that all their rules will be the same as yours?

Well research through the Language and Behaviour Profile tool has revealed that 75% of us will presume that everyone else is likely to have the same rules as us!  15% of us will presume that other people have their own rules which may or may not be the same.  3% have a lack of interest in other people’s rules and 7% have rules for other people, but not for themselves!

And if you decide you don’t like your rules or they don’t help you. Break them!  Change them.  Make new ones.

"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." - George Bernard Shaw